Now I have finished my 2011 workshop teaching. It is a good time to calm down and examine myself as an artist, and a new entrepreneur, as a dreamer, and as practitioner.... most important, as a human being. Last night I had a dream. I dreamed I was in a hurry to attend a very important event (but I don't know what is was) in a far away place. I just had an old bicycle not going very fast. I was so out of shape and my legs were so weak. I tried all my might, but just could not pedal the bike fast enough. I was exhausted, zigzag out of balance, but my destination is far beyond reaching..... I think this reveals the worry in my mind. I have no right to complain because I am far more fortunate than many many people in the world. But I do have some wishful thinking. I wish life is much simpler. I wish I can be less busy. I wish I could paint more. I feel I have entered a difficult phase of my art development. There is a demon growing with my art and trying to destroy my art and my life. Fighting this demon takes a lot of my energy and time. I have seen more and more time I lost my battle now. If you see my art is not in good shape, that indicates I am dealing with the demon. However, I will keep going. I can't guarantee I can make it, but I will keep going.
11 comments:
Awful dream. No doubt you are overwhelmed. Hopefully you will have a few weeks to wind down, catch up, and paint a lot. There is no telling in your beautiful art that you are struggling. I personally admire how you push yourself to help and encourage other artists. Thanks for taking time away from your painting to help us. Best wishes!
Hang in there! Try to make time for yourself to paint. When I don't have time to paint, things seem to go out of control. Like a part of me is missing. The calm will return. I will pray for you tonight!
I was at your Rosenberg workshop and as I told you, I enjoyed it very much. Sometimes we all need to take a few steps back and re-evaluate our lives. You give so much of yourself in your art. Your inspire all of us. Please take time for you and your family. I will also keep you in my prayers that you will get rid of your demons.
We hold you in our thoughts. You have given so much pleasure with your paintings. I hope that you will soon experience the peace and happiness you deserve. We send our best wishes to you.
Great colour balance
These last two paintings which you did quickly in your demos are just lovely. Take some time for yourself and family. We appreciate all the time you share with us and your expertise!
This painting is just lovely. It reminds me of some of your older paintings which I love so much. I am sorry you are plagued by your demons, we all have demons. I feel you should stop being concerned about learning from other painters for a while, and just let your own inspiration and great talent guide you. Look back at Qiang's work, all your own beautiful paintings, and just try to continue painting in your own style. Relax, and know that your own style has always been what has given us all so much pleasure. Don't pressure yourself so much to change, or improve,(I think that feeds the demons) and just let your art flow from your heart and enjoy your work as much as we do.
Dear Master. It is hardly necessary to give themselves to despondency. All the same thing in any kind of work energy of the author. For her sake, and look at the beautiful experiments of the audience. I wish you win the demons.
Dear Qiang,
How recognizable, the demon. If I work hard I have no time to think how to paint. If I think, I do not feel what I want to paint.
The only thing to make it happen is ; go to what it is that you feel. If it feels ok, than do it, if not, dont.
It is the only way to fight the demon. Go from your heart. Feel and do not think.
You are in a difficult place as an entrepreneur and artist, but if you do not follow your heart, you will be nowhere.
And I am an optimist. Whisfullthinking, the imagination of details, thats important too.
Those are things that come to my mind in answer to your mention of the demon. It is in all of us.
Love and courage! Anne Marie.
Qiange not to worry, most artists go through phases where the "devil" trys to take over . . . that's when we stray from our true self and focus on other things (like money or status)instead of true painting and true living. You will find your way . . .
But I like that devil which you were talking about. It makes your paintings beautiful and unique.
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